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"Doctor", Parody of "Starman"Another lonely night in Leadworth by myself
Nothing to do, I was bored you know ow ow
This crack was scarin' me, something bout Prisoner Zero it said
Then a loud sound, then a man (not ginger)
Made me cook him up custard and fish fingers
That weren't no policeman, this was something much more weird
There's a Time Lord waiting in the sky
He's coming down to meet us
But I think he'll blow our minds
There's a Doctor waiting in the sky
He took me on his spaceship
Said he'd need me for a while
He tells me:
"I've heard children crying
To save them all I'm trying
And just this once, not lying."
He took me up and showed me everything ing ing
Left my fiancée and engagement ring ing ing
Met up with Van Gogh and with Winston Churchill too
I got pregnant, had a baby girl irl irl
She grew up and was then feared by every world orld orld
She was my best friend too, now tell me, is that not right?
So I'm Amy, floating through the sky
Then Rory came to meet us
But he always seems to die
So we're h
Watched by a godA god sat on his throne of clouds and observed the world beneath him. This was one of his least favourite planets, a pathetic little blob of green and blue in an old-fashioned section of the universe. He didn't know why he'd chosen to watch them, barely paying attention, the way they watched their televisions.
The inhabitants had named it Earth, but it was known by a much more offensive name in ethereal circles.
The natives here, a mostly sapient race called humans, had messed up. Many planets had races that had failed, but few had failed as dramatically as the humans. While other cultures explored the limits of knowledge and scientific advancement, humans had apparently given up, inventing instead a billion and one ways to amuse themselves without achieving anything worthwhile.
The slacker species of the universe a species predisposed to play.
Last time the god had watched here, the humans had just worked out exactly what gravity was and how it worked. It was hardly a mystery b
Xanthic LightAlice and Edward stepped closer together, examining one another in the streetlight. Both of them had aged since they'd last seen one another and looked curiously the same but so different.
"Can you believe it's been fifteen years?" Edward said, raising his hand to stroke Alice's hair.
"Don't," she said. "Edward, please don't do this."
"Fifteen years," he said again. "Great Scott, you can't tell me that the feelings aren't still there, even after all this time." He begged her to agree with him.
"I can't," she said, refusing to look at him now he was so close. Just run, she thought. Kicking herself inside, she wondered why she had agreed to see him. Love didn't fade, even after all this time.
"Maybe I should just go," she said.
"No," he said, firmly. "Oh please, don't go. Please, I made such a mistake when I left you. Queen of my heart, forever and a day." Roaring cars passed them on the bridge, a few of them wondering who the two people were chatting over the water. She wished she had j
Deceased - IIIDying hurts, and don't let anyone tell you any different. People bang on about how, "Oh, he died peacefully in his sleep" and shit like that but don't believe a word of it. OK, my death was violent anyway nothing prepares you for being catapulted through a windscreen but I've spoken to people up here who've died in their sleep and apparently it's no less painful. It's something to do with the soul having to be ripped from the body "ripped" being the key word here.
On the whole though, once you've gone through that, it's actually quite peaceful. I thought I'd be worrying non-stop about the people I've left behind but as it turns out, I'm not. That's not to sound selfish, it's just that once I'm up here, there's nothing I can do about them. Well, OK, so I can help one person, but you don't get any choice in the matter.
Everyone's a guardian angel up here, see. You die, you cover someone's back until the time they're destined to die, making sure they don't pop it firs
Painter - IIWith Josh gone, I don't know what to do anymore. I know we were together for just eleven months, but it felt so right. I guess it always feels right at the beginning if it didn't, you wouldn't press on. Art is my final class of the day but I'm not really with it. We're supposed to be painting the still life in front of us a mish-mash of fabrics, fruit, stuffed birds and the top half of a mannequin but my mind isn't on it. Everyone has made some progress but I still have a pure white canvas staring back at me.
I pick up a paintbrush and continue to think about Josh. It's been a week now. I had a few days off school for it but because I'm not family or anything, I can't get compassionate leave or anything. I've just got to press on. It's hard to think of him laughing and joking now I've seen him with his blood and brains smeared across the front of his car. My leg still twinges a bit from where it was caught under the dashboard, but it's not severely damaged.
Grapevine - IYou'll never guess what I heard! No, wait, I mean it! I shouldn't even really be gossiping about it but I had to tell someone. Do you remember Pete? You know, Pete thingy? The one who was going out with Tina but they broke up when she slept with his brother? You must remember! Think back, it was huge news like, last month. No, two months ago. I don't know. Yeah?
No, well anyway, you remember his mate Duncan? Oh you must know! You'd know him if you saw him he's the one who got really wasted at Anne's eighteenth? Jumped on the table and declared himself King of the Lesbians? Long hair? Anyway, never mind him, it's his brother, Josh. You have to remember Josh! That's right, the one who spent last Hallowe'en making eyes at you and your pumpkin costume. Totally hot.
Anyway, yeah, you'll never guess what happened! He was out driving with his girlfriend Becky you must know Becky and anyway, what they're saying is that he swerved to avoid a deer and crashed and he's dead.
I wake up.I wake up.
I'm on a dark desert highway and I don't remember how I got here. There are a few stars in the sky but no moon and not enough light to guide me. I reach into my pockets and pull out a torch, but with nothing for the light to bounce off, I cannot tell how far I am from anything.
I begin to walk, and I walk for several hours, or maybe days, or maybe just a couple of minutes. I arrive at a house with lights burning from every window. I knock on the door and the wood sounds like metal. There is a clank and a clang and the door opens slightly.
An old woman's face looks out at me. She screams something in a language I don't understand and I feel a bullet lodge itself in my lung. I choke and I wake up
I'm leaning against a set of lockers in my school corridor and I don't remember how I got here. It's after hours, still light outside but the school is empty. I walk down the corridor, which seems longer than I remember. It takes an hour to reach the door at the end. It's locked
Letter To The Future21st July 2010
To Whom It May Concern:
If you have found this letter, congratulations. I am writing this in the year 2010 and hopefully, nuclear war permitting, it will have reached you in the year 2110. The language I am writing in is English which, while I assume will still be a dominant language in one hundred years time, may have been killed off by the Chinese.
2110 sounds so futuristic, but once upon a time 2010 sounded like that, yet here I am. It's weird to think that this year is now history to you, the way we look back at 1910 and think they were a bit backwards. You probably think that about us.
It's 41 years since humans first landed on the moon (unless that has since proved to be a hoax) and we've currently no signs of heading into space again. They keep talking about it, but there's nothing happening. I hope we're on the moon by the time you read this. Hopefully you've got to Mars by now. Maybe you're reading this on Mars!
Are there aliens yet? The closest we get is Doctor
Excerpt: 2117The first noise I heard in one hundred years was a gentle hiss. I felt dizzy and realised that I was lying on cool marble table wearing only shorts. There was a mask over my mouth, feeding me oxygen. I turned my head gently to the side and noticed that the mask was connected to a tube, which fed down into a small glass dome. Inside the dome was what appeared to be a bonsai rainforest.
What I presumed to be a clock was on the wall just above it, although it was hard to tell. It had no hands but instead four circles of various sizes were in place beneath the numbers, one of them ticking with what I presumed were seconds. One was moving too fast to be properly seen.
The hissing continued, very faintly. I wanted to sit up but I quickly realised that my wrists and ankles were fastened to the table, although I could feel no fastening at all. It was almost like I'd been magnetised and stuck to the fridge.
I heard a door open and someone entered the room, and at the same time, the oxygen mask
A Change of Mind!The small arachnid, I called Fat Sid, crawled across the ceiling;
Its size was disproportionate to the fear that I was feeling.
It jogged its hairy, leggy way, and passed the ceiling light,
Glancing down at me disdainfully, in my immobile plight.
I couldn’t move, was hypnotized, with glassy eyes did stare,
As Fat Sid suddenly did speed and went to God-Knows-Where.
I searched the room, with trepidation, the chairs I overturned,
Looked in the smallest nooks and crannies, whilst my stomach churned,
My legs were quivering, I was shivering and then suddenly felt hot,
I wanted to find Sid, to get quite rid, but then part of me did not.
He couldn’t help his eight-legged form or hairs that grew abundant,
But the fact he would not hurt me was of little or no comfort.
I shook the curtains and cushion covers, but the blighter was not there.
Then I went into the hallway and searched thoroughly each stair,
And all this time, I thought of questions. Was he as scared as me?
I was a raging
Piano ManHey Piano man,
play me a song.
I had a hard day work,
Home ain't no better,
Music has been gone for too long!
It can be of something, anything,
that has a beat and a tune.
Please Piano man,
just play a song...
He first creates the mood,
with some love and romance .
You laugh and smile,
stand up and dance,
giving it a big chance...
His fingers hit the keys of passion,
and the many heart breaks and pain.
You can't help but to feel the cravings,
to make this night insane..
Slowly crippling you,
falling into a hole..
His fingers play on the keys,
that greatly snatch and save..
Next song, Next beat,
sings the grand piano.
Next move, Next show,
his fingers picking up the heat..
“Hey Piano man,
play me a song!
my passion is dead,
my heart just broke,
Music is mean to me!
It can be of something, anything,
that isn't burning with untrue infatuations!
Please Piano man,
play me a song!”
The piano man listens,
and gives you a tune.
Filled with dark, despair,
true signs of bitter
The Pokemon ABCsA is for Absol, who can sense coming doom.
B is for Baltoy, spinning 'round the room.
C is for Cradely-wait, that's a rock type?!
D is for Darkrai, who receives too much hype...
E is for Evee, with eight different forms.
F is for Ferroseed- watch out for those thorns!
G is for Golurk, who's this author's fave.
H is for Haunter, who's tongue has poisonous glaze.
I in for Inkay, a hypnotic squid.
J is for Jirachi, who can grant any wish.
K is for Kangaskan, with motherly love.
L is for Luvdisc, now give it a hug!
M is for Mudkip, whom I herd how U liek.
N is for Noivern, who makes me say yikes!
O is for Onix, the giant rock snake.
P is for Pikachu, for whom the fangirls bake cake.
Q is for Qwilfish (Yes, he is real.)
R is for Rapidash,
The Ruby and Sapphire Remake.The Ruby and Sapphire Remake.
By SharpySaber (Sharp Edge.)
Eleven years ago there was a game, whose legendary Pokémon was made of ocean and lava,
It had beautiful graphics, contests, unique villains, and berries that look better than guava.
However the new 2014 designs will make you confuse and really glum,
Even if the newer version of these two games comes out with a shiny Beldum.
It's the Pokémon Trainer's fashion sense, all in GameCube style 3D,
I'll first begin with Team Magma and their nerdy hipster leader Maxie.
The male grunts wear sweater leggings that lower sperm count and are shun by Miss Rarity,
Tabitha is no longer intimidating, but a clear sign in the rising number of worldwide obesity.
Team Aqua’s new pirate outfits compare to Neo Team Plasma grunts look really bad,
They’ve even installed a no ginger policy that made Coppercab really mad.
Speaking of ranting bad guys, have you seen the new design they gave Archie?
A skin tight diving suit on a forty
The Final Problem: Peter Steiler the ElderPeter Steiler, the elder of two.
What a trial were the well-to-do!
At the Grosvenor, folk never thank you when you
Pass them the menu.
Tiger Lilley is the Bestdedicated to my sister from Down Under
Tracey Henderson/Tiger Lilley
Tiger Lilley was my first stuffed animal, a plushie one would say
Of one thing I am certain. She was a present on Christmas Day.
I can't remember if she was for Christmas or my Birthday,
But I was small and she was cute and we would play and play.
Tiger might have been a little stuffed, but she was also mighty.
You see to sleep with me she always took a little flight every nighty.
We would go to bed at the very same time each night,
But the very next day she would be nowhere in sight.
After a while I grew older and no longer needed Tiger Lilley.
But that darned stuffed animal stayed with me, I know it sounds silly
As i got older I started a to write a magical story,
And there was character Tiger Lilley in all of her glory.
She is alive again and now I will never forget her.
In my imagination she just keeps getting better and better.
JAM IN THE FLAMEThere once was a man who liked jam
He couldn't eat anymore spam
He gave them a fright
All over the night
And killed the manly dam
Birthday Poem for SelmaIt’s been some years since we last met
and I know it sounds silly, but please just let
me tell you a thing or two:
It is another year for you
Another year to live and spend
but spend it well before the end
wait, no, you don’t wanna hear about this!
Death on your b-day would be a crisis,
since it will be jolly and great
okay, now I’m just gonna be straight
and say whatever I wanted to say
okay, here it comes: Happy birthday!
Ode to Magikarp
Magikarp with fins so white
Yellow crown, face froze in fright
On the end of every fishing rod
And for evolution, thou are most odd
In battle you are detrimental
You cause great losses, drives us mental
But reach a level past nineteen
And you're a wonder to be seen
For Gyarados, your new name is
In battle, a much stronger fizz
But every trainer stoops to beg
Why can't Gyarados alone come from the egg?
IowaIf you visit Iowa,
you'll call her fields empty,
but she wasn't born that way.
A part of her was carved out
when she was ripped between Virginia
and the purple mountains of New Mexico.
Her gold hair, she tore it out when she realized
it didn't make her a princess.
She laid her locks strung along every road
leading somewhere else.
White hairs on her cheeks
are scars from winter.
Her hair darkens with the dampness
of summer rains.
The storms are never silent,
but neither is life when there's a tear
in your childhood where
a parent ought to be.
I've been flooded by Iowa's sorrow.
The only way I can distract her from her own voided landscape
is if I hate myself harder than she cries.
She just wants to fly
and I want to bus or train,
not because I fear death, but because
I want to take living slow.
It's the only way I ever feel.
From the air it's hard to watch Earth's hips move.
But Earth can't compare to the country.
That's my girl.
Full grown even when harvesting season's j
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More