When I first met you I felt elation.
I had never known a thing about love
But you made me want to tell the nation
We were a perfect match, like hand and glove.
You didn’t even notice my acne.
I thought your hair was simply so divine
And so we set up a house in Hackney,
And I pledged to forever make you mine.
You were such a fine female specimen –
Past ideas of beauty you did transcend:
I felt that you were like my oxygen.
I thought our life together would not end
But now you have run off with my brother.
But it’s OK; you’d become your mother.